I THINK I MADE IT

I made it – I think.

It’s the day following Thanksgiving in USA and as you probably are aware, many people eat too much that day. I was one of the many with emphasis on the TOO in ‘too much’. Way too much!

However, by some miracle of nature my body seems to have managed to process enough food to feed a small nation though it was touch and go there for awhile. Today I am a bit wiser, not that it will matter next time.

I’m not sure if I imagined this or it was a dream but last night I saw a newspaper headline proclaiming: CARMEL MAN EATS SELF TO DEATH.

Never again. Probably Well maybe.

The Old Professor

Carmel, CA

November 24, 2006

HAPPY THANKSGIVING DAY

Today is the last Thursday in November, which is a national holiday in the United States. It’s called Thanksgiving Day and it’s traditional that friends and families gather around a table bearing huge amounts of food. We all overeat and give thanks that, in spite of there being millions who are hungry and starving, we are not one of them.

I hope you had a nice day.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
November 23, 2006

I MAKE A GREAT DISCOVERY

I’ve noticed I haven’t been posting any blogs lately. There’s a reason for this. Up until today there really hasn’t been anything worthy of passing on.

Today that changed and I made a major discovery. Like most of my fellow famous discovery people my discovery came about quite by accident. I don’t feel I need to apologize for this as you may recall they say one of the most famous discoverers of all time, Sir Isaac Newton, discovered gravity by noticing an apple falling from a tree. I don’t contend that my discovery ranks with that but it certainly is worth sharing with you and might earn me a place on the Famous Discoveries TV program.

Most people know that dogs need exercise and walking usually takes care of this. Most people, except a few who pass our house, know that walking dogs often pause to take care of a physical elimination situation. Most people, except a few who pass our house, know the courteous thing to do is clean up after your dog finishes its business. This often accomplished in a rather simple fashion. All that’s needed a small plastic bag. The size of the bag is somewhat dependent upon the size of the dog. While staring off into space the dog owner puts his or her hand inside the plastic bag and then, using it as a glove, reaches down and picks up the stuff the dog has left. The scientific name for this stuff is dog poop.

After picking up the dog poop the plastic bag is usually twisted and folded some way to make sure the poop stays inside the bag. This step is fairly critical. It is then taken to wherever unwanted things are taken and disposed of.

Now I realize there isn’t anything there that could possibly be described as a great discovery. Many people already knew that. But here’s something no one I know of has ever mentioned. It is very important that poop picker-upper closely examines the plastic bag prior to using it. One must make sure the bag does not have any holes in it! If it’s clear plastic these holes are difficult to see but I have found that dog poop has an affinity to these holes and, if allowed, the poop will somehow find the hole and be well on its way to your hands. Furthermore, if you decide to transport the twisted and folded bag in your jacket pocket you will have a jacket that may have no future use other than possible attire for attending dogs shows.

I realize this discovery does not really put me in a class with Newton, Columbus and all the other great discoverers but I certainly wish someone had discovered it before I did.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
November 19, 2006

I'M BACK

There is a rather simple reason I haven’t posted a blog here in quite some time. There just hasn’t been anything in my life I considered bloggable. To my mind whatever I write should be important enough to be of interest to someone or at least seem humorous to me. Everything passing through my life in the past few weeks has been as bland as baby food. That’s not a complaint. In fact, I rather like it that way.

All was as dull as usual until this morning. I was listening to the radio while out walking with TDD (The Damned Dog). I heard that China was working trying to help Africa get on its feet and there was a big meeting in Beijing, the capital of China, and there were representatives from 48 African countries. Not too unusual so far, but wait.

Chinese State Councilor Tang Jiaxuan met with officials from African countries at the Great Hall of the People in Beijing, capital of China. The Councilor shook hands with 40 delegates one at a time.

Now the Chinese are known for being responsible for many creative ideas but this idea of shaking hands with people one at a time – who came up with that? Even assuming the reporter meant “one person at a time” rather than “one hand at a time” it still seems rather an inefficient way to do it. You would think someone would have suggested having the delegates stack their hands up, maybe ten to a pile but certainly not “one at a time”.

So that’s how exciting things have been in The Old Professor’s life. Sad isn’t it?

The Old Professor

Carmel, CA

November 4, 2006