JUST KIDDING, SIR

In glancing back to several of my previous blogs I note there are one or two, okay, several, where I more or less poke fun at the White House and/or the occupants thereof. I want it clearly understood by all who may read those gibes (including any Secret service agents) that it was all in fun. George W. Bush is known for having a great sense of humor and though I haven't heard from him I’m sure he just chuckled.

I want this clearly understood at this time after reading
an Associated Press item in the paper today.

Pennsylvania Man's Letter Brings Secret Service

By Associated Press
Posted January 22 2007, 9:15 AM EST

BETHLEHEM, Pa. -- An elderly man who wrote in a letter to the editor about Saddam Hussein's execution that "they hanged the wrong man" got a visit from Secret Service agents concerned he was threatening President Bush.

The letter by Dan Tilli, 81, was published in Monday's edition of The Express-Times of Easton, Pa. It ended with the line, "I still believe they hanged the wrong man."

Tilli said the statement was not a threat. "I didn't say who -- I could've meant (Osama) bin Laden," he said Friday.

Two Secret Service agents questioned Tilli at his Bethlehem apartment Thursday, briefly searching the place and taking pictures of him, he said.

The Secret Service confirmed the encounter. Bob Slama, special agent in charge of the Secret Service's Philadelphia office, said it was the agency's duty to investigate.

The agents almost immediately decided Tilli was not a threat, Slama said

"We have no further interest in Dan," he said.
Tilli said the agents appeared more relaxed when he dug out a scrapbook containing more than 200 letters that he has written over the years, almost all on political topics.
"He said, 'Keep writing, but just don't make no threats,'" Tilli said of one of the agents.
It wasn't Tilli's first run-in with the federal government over his letter writing. Two FBI agents from Allentown showed up at his home last year about a letter he wrote advocating a civil war to unseat Bush, he said.

You knew I was only kidding Mr. Bush, sir. Didn’t you?

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 22, 2007

ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

Okay George, now that’s it!

The other day I posted a blog about people who “take responsibility” are supposed to pay some price. Our local newspaper even thought the idea was sound enough to publish it. Apparently you either, did not see it or chose to ignore it. Now this morning I pick up the paper and read you were on PBS’s NewsHour with the respected reporter Jim Leher. From what I read you said:

''We should have found troops and moved them,'' Bush said. ''But part of it was that the Iraqis didn't move troops. And I take responsibility for us not moving our own troops into Baghdad.''

Enough with just saying you're “taking responsibility”! This time go to your room and you don’t get to use Air Force One for a week!

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 18, 2007

INTELLIGENT DESIGN

As I was getting dressed I thought about this business of “Intelligent Design”. I’m sure you’ve heard the arguments many times but in case you were out shopping or something one definition from Wikipedia, is:

Intelligent design (ID) is the modern concept, presented by the Discovery Institute, that "certain features of the universe and of living things are best explained by an intelligent cause, not an undirected process such as natural selection." It is a version of the ancient argument for God called the teleological argument, reframed with the assertion that it is a scientific theory finding signs of design by an unidentifiable intelligent being.

Mostly this can be simplified, or perhaps oversimplified, by saying there are many people who do not believe in Darwin’s Theory of Evolution but believe God designed everything.

Without becoming too involved with this let me present my thoughts based on many years of being closely involved with the design process.

If some identity did design the human body there were, and still are, many design flaws. For example, as I thought this morning, why are the feet so far away from the hands when the hands need to put socks on the feet? Even a student in Human Body Design 101 would spot that.

And why can’t humans see what’s behind them? Even my little Toyota automobile has a camera so I can see when I’m going backwards. Yet the human body can’t do that.

The examples of poor design are endless though I agree that some parts are well designed. I have theory that really should satisfy both the evolutionists and the ID people. I think there is a source of the design. Most likely it’s a committee but they do as most designers do. They make a prototype to see if it works. Then they make another one to patch the things that should have been done in the first model until they finally end up with what we call a human. This can’t be the end of the design process. They can’t stop now anymore than they could when they designed the giraffe and someone noticed the neck was a little long. It isn’t that we rose from the slime but rather we are just another newer model.

I can’t wait to see what the next model looks like. I mean that literally. I won’t be around because the process takes too long but the new and improved model should be great and putting socks on will be a lot easier too.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 15, 2007

I TAKE FULL RESPONSIBILITY

What in the world is going on here and why hasn’t someone else noticed it?  The White House has found the “Get Out of Jail Card”.  Someone has discovered that by saying the words “I take full responsibility” nothing happens and the problem just goes away.

Think back to that fiasco in New Orleans after Hurricane Katrina did its thing.  In case you missed it, a gigantic hurricane slammed into New Orleans in late August of 2005.  The reaction of all of the governmental agencies was pathetic.   Michael D. Brown, who was the head of the Federal Emergency Management Agency came under much fire but President Bush arranged a television appearance where he said, “Brownie, you're doing a heck of a job," A couple of days later he was relived of his duties. So much for presidential on-camera praise.

But on September 9, 2005 President Bush again addressed the Katrina problem and said, “To the extent that the federal government didn’t fully do its job right, I take responsibility.” [New York Times, 9/13/05]

Well, no one disagrees with the assumption that “the federal government didn’t fully do its job right” and I wondered what taking the “responsibility” meant. What was going to happen to the person who willingly accepted “responsibility”?  I didn’t see anything unusual happen.

Then I noticed last night (1/10/2005) when the president addressed the nation via television to explain his new approach to the Iraq situation.  He said, “Where mistakes (in Iraq) have been made, the responsibility rests with me.”

Here again, he is taking responsibility but what happens now?  When you or I do something wrong and accept the responsibility there is usually a consequence.  We might feel pain, lose money or maybe even go to prison.  But this new “responsibility” doesn’t seem to involve anything.  How can that be?”

Perhaps the next time I happen to be driving and am stopped by a police officer I’ll just say, “As far as anything I might have done wrong, I’ll accept full responsibility, Officer.”  Then I’ll roll up the window and drive off.  If it works in Washington it should work in Carmel too.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 11, 2007

RESCUING ADVENTURERS

Just recently there was a story in the news about a young man who was attempting a solo circumnavigation of the world. He planned to leave the west coast of the United States and sail his 40-foot sailboat around the world all by himself. He happened to run into a huge storm that wrecked his boat but finally, with the help of several governments, he was rescued.

A few weeks ago some young men were attempting to do some rather high mountain climbing and became lost. In spite of hundreds of hours of searching there was no good outcome for this one.

Now I don’t fault anyone who wants to do something challenging, especially if it’s never been done before. However, I do see the television coverage involving search parties, helicopters and all kinds of rescue attempts and I wonder who is paying for it. It must involve a small fortune to search for and find someone lost at sea or a party who has climbed halfway to outer space.

Wouldn’t it make sense that insurance should be required before such undertakings begin? Where I live I am not even allowed to drive my car on the highway without first having insurance to cover any accident I may get involved with. Wouldn’t it make sense to have similar insurance for these adventurers?

Sure it would be expensive but it makes sense to me.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 6, 2007

IN THE NEWSPAPER TODAY

I am so grateful that we have daily newspapers. I can’t imagine what life would be like without my daily dose of idiocy appearing in print each day. This morning was no exception.

The Associated Press news agency had a rather nice story this morning about a couple who were about to have a child from a frozen embryo that was rescued from a hospital in New Orleans during the Katrina hurricane disaster. It seems that some police officers had managed to save thousands of frozen embryos when the power was lost at the hospital where the eggs were stored. An official commented:

"That is great! I'm going to call all our officers and tell them. They'll be pretty excited," said Lt. Eric Bumgarner, one of seven Illinois Conservation Police officers and three Louisiana state troopers who sloshed through floodwaters to remove the embryos. Bumgarner said he has often wondered what happened to the embryos: "One of these embryos could be the next president."

Now theoretically this might be possible however since we will get our next president about 2 years from now I think there are constitutional provisions that make it unlikely we will have a 2-year old president. But, in the event these things could somehow be overcome, it might be possible to get a booster seat for him so he could see over his desk and teach him a few more words. Then he could proceed to learn what most 2-year olds learn. Things like, “If you mess around with a bully you are apt to get hurt.” Or even more basic things like, “If you start doing something and it hurts – stop doing it.”

It might work.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 4, 2007

ANOTHER HUGE DISCOVERY

The celebrate American author, Mark Twain, once said, “Everybody talks about the weather, but nobody does anything about it.” Well, I may have stumbled upon something that just might refute that. I don’t have the system perfected just yet but I did run a test this morning.

It rain rather heavily all last night. I didn’t have anything to do with that. In fact, I hadn’t discovered my system of weather control yet. That happened later the next morning. It started with my evaluating when I should go outside and do the things I need to do daily. We have a couple of rather rude horses that board here and I throw some hay at these thankless beasts every morning. They seem to ignore the rain as well as the hand that feeds them. And then there is Jake, the small dog we acquired. He needs to be walked every morning. His owner needs to be walked also so he, (aka I) waited as long as possible hoping the rain would stop. It didn’t stop or even slow down so eventually I put on the heavy rain gear and headed out. It was pouring but I did manage to do the hay thing even though I ended up covered with loose hay and looking like the Straw Man in The Wizard of Oz.

Then Jake and I slogged up the road until he got around to do his thing and then we headed back. By this time I was mentally evaluating getting some new rain gear. I’ve read there are pieces of clothing that actually do keep the rain out and really protect whatever is inside. I had pretty well made my decision when I noticed we were in our driveway, trudging uphill towards the house.

Then it stopped raining.

Now in my mind there is absolutely no other conclusion for me to come to other than the fact that the raining and the cessation of the rain were directly related to the decisions I made as to my going outside or not. That’s the basic part of the discovery but I haven’t quite worked out the details of actually controlling it yet. When I discover that I’ll publish it here so the entire world will benefit.

The Soggy Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 4, 2007

HAS ANYONE ELSE NOTICED THIS?

I’ve noticed something lately and wonder if anyone else has. Lately it seems that when I drop something on the floor and bend over to pick it up the distance is much longer than it used to be.  Now it takes me much more time to retrieve the item than it formerly did.

Though I don’t have any scientific backup on this, my theory is that our planet is getting smaller hence the distance an item travels before it hits the floor is longer than it previously was.  Naturally, the retrieval time is longer too.

I wonder what’s causing this shrinking. Maybe I should write to Al Gore and ask him.

The Old Professor
Carmel, CA
January 2, 2007